Letting Down Your Barriers and Opening Up...

This is a tricky topic to discuss as there are many of you who will call opening up to people naive, and others who will have had bad experiences in the past resulting in their trust being broken. However, this post isn't to persuade you to do so, every person is different, this post is only highlighting both sides of the argument for you to decide for yourself.

Stopping Barriers Affecting Friendships

As hard as it may be, dropping your barriers is usually the start of a friendship, or relationship. People appreciate others being honest and placing trust in them and usually return the favour. I'm a great believer in giving trust to receive it, and I know for certain that I'm the one who always opens up first (ridiculously so or not). If you are looking for a romantic relationship, opening up is the best way of breaking the ice with someone you're interested in. If you struggle with the dropping of barriers, the best way is to begin with talking about your feelings, as honest as you can be, but as much as you want to. No matter how much you elaborate, it is equally appreciated on both sides and will definitely bring the two of you closer together.

Many people wonder how to let down their barriers, and even more interestingly, some people don't know what the phrase even means. My explanation would be this, "Letting down your barriers involves opening up to someone to the point of having their trust." Simple, but straight to the point nevertheless.

Sometimes a simple hug is a less obvious way of letting down your barriers as it is a personal gesture and often evokes emotions anyway. After going through a period of sadness, opening up to another is the key to moving on. Spend time to dwell on the sadness, but not to the point of it being obsessive, that only does more harm in the long-term. After dwelling on the events, it is time to share them with someone else, talking to another cures most of the pain as they can sympathise and offer their support.

Embracing Vulnerability

Remember that limiting how open you are is limiting yourself to opportunities too. Some of your personal experiences may be the difference between gaining a new friend, being chosen for a job, starting a relationship, or not. Opening up also benefits you, your state of mind is always positive and you will generally feel better about yourself, particularly as you are being honest with yourself as well as with others. Holding back may affect those around you negatively. I personally feel like I'm not trusted when I can see someone is avoiding probing questions purposely. I always doubt myself and wonder if we are ever really friends to begin with.

There's a huge difference between opening up and spilling your heart out. Many people would feel overwhelmed by the sheer amount of trust you have in them if the situation was at an emotional high, but you can open up a little without it seeming that way, plus it's more comfortable for you too. More often than not, it allows for more people to come into your life who are attracted to your level of emotion and trust combined, which are a better suit for you as a person.

Being let down a multiple number of times doesn't mean that you shouldn't open up, or are stupid for doing so. It only means that the people beforehand were in the wrong for taking advantage of you, not any fault of your own. You won't be disappointed forever, keep doing what you're doing.